Every tricky traverse in mountain, stream or forest needed doing twice over: once to find a way for himself, then to collect the steed, often carrying it shoulder-high through sharp palmetto, or water, or rocks.
Ferdinand looked to have sealed it when he calmly sidefooted a loose ball into the bottom corner after a cross from the third former Tottenham player in the Sunderland starting line-up, the influential Steed Malbranque, caused yet more problems.
Keane tapped in the first after Steed Malbranque's volley had hit the post.
Reid crossed to the far post where Steed Malbranque was lurking, but his header was prevented from crossing the line by what replays proved was a clear handball from Pugh.
Lulled by the swaying of your wrinkly steed, you suddenly emerge from thick brush onto the savannah, catching sight of a herd of impala.
Berbatov was again the architect, laying the ball back for Jenas, whose thumping shot was parried by the Finn, who then snaked out an arm to fingertip Steed Malbranque's follow-up around the post.
The green-skinned Martian (obviously Tars Tarkas, the leader of the Tharks) sits on his steed.
At a rowdy JJB Stadium, Bramble inadvertently nodded home from a Steed Malbranque cross in the 15th minute.
This tendency was confirmed by two more academics, John Curtice and Michael Steed, who studied the 1992 election.
It was Richardson's last action of significance, as he came off the pitch to be replaced by Steed Malbranque.
Kenwyne Jones pounced on an error from Blackburn goalkeeper Paul Robinson to level before Djibril Cisse converted a Steed Malbranque pass for the winner.
Alert Steed Malbranque ran round the back of slumbering marker Carlos Cuellar but, though Bardsley's deep cross cleared the Spaniard, the Black Cats midfielder steered his back-post header wide.
Senior Jon Steed, public information officer for the Texas Aggie Democrats, describes the campus as mostly apathetic but attributes students' politics to their backgrounds.
Wales defender Collins was also involved in the second incident when Cisse tumbled to the ground as he ran on to a Steed Malbranque flick.
The versatile Finnish international became Sunderland manager Roy Keane's first summer signing on Wednesday, but is set to be joined at the north-east club by Pascal Chimbonda, Steed Malbranque and Younes Kaboul.
Steed Malbranque and Radzinski were in inspired form, the latter's pass causing indecision in the Bolton defence and allowing McBride to nip in and score.
Substitute Steed Malbranque's strike was beaten away by the over-worked - if not entirely convincing - Kingson, and the keeper also did well to keep out Henderson's 18-yard strike.
The goal did at least spark some attacking fervour from Tottenham, with Steed Malbranque seeing a firm shot deflected wide and then a volley minutes later palmed wide by Gomes.
"Justice has arrived for Warren Steed Jeffs, " said Assistant Texas Attorney General Eric Nichols, who prosecuted the case.
FORBES: Polygamist FLDS Leader Warren Jeffs Sentenced to Life in Prison
But the keeper was beaten again on 32 minutes when Johnson's fine first touch earned him a yard of space inside Steed Malbranque and set up a left-foot shot that deflected wickedly off the knee of Turner and beyond Gordon's reach.
With Arsenal slowly beginning to take control of the match they were reduced to 10 men when Song was shown a second yellow for blocking Steed Malbranque.
Joe Wolfson's steed was a board known as a bodyboard, about four feet long, rather than the longer and heavier traditional Hawaiian type.
Fulham began to threaten, and Steed Malbranque forced a good save from Russell Hoult with a right-foot drive from the edge of the box.
The England striker made it 2-0 just six minutes later, finishing well after being fed in by Steed Malbranque.
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