The Jokes Barn - GO - making the world funnier - one joke at a time.
笑话谷仓-往-使世界变得更加有趣-一个笑话的时间。
One joke says that God loves taxi drivers because they inspire so many people to pray.
有个笑话说，上帝爱出租车司机是因为他们激励很多人祈祷。
Happiness starts with one word, one joke, one text, one phone call , one song, one hug, one kiss and stops in one mistake.
幸福的起点或许是一个字，一句玩笑，一条短信，一通电话，一首歌曲，一个拥抱，一个亲吻……但幸福的终点往往只是一个错误。
The wolf thought he was in joke, and came one night to get a dainty morsel.
狼以为他是在开玩笑，一天晚上来取美味的食物。
There is nothing worse than falling for a joke and being a fool except one day.
除了这一天，没有什么比被一个笑话愚弄，变成一个傻子更糟糕的了。
Customers would joke that one day I'd be sitting at their table, waiting to be served.
顾客会开玩笑说，有一天我会坐在他们的桌子旁，等着服务上门。
One day, we thought, all problems would be solved and there wouldn't be any more jokes because there wouldn't be anything left to joke about.
我们当时认为：总有一天，所有的问题都会得到解决，然后就不会再有笑话，因为到那时就没什么好开玩笑的事情了。
There used to be an old joke in America that people should take a bath once a week, whether they need one or not.
以前在美国有一个老笑话，说不管人们需不需要，他们至少每个礼拜该洗一次澡。
One day, when he was feeling very bored, the boy decided to play a practical joke on the villagers.
有一天，当他感到很无聊，男孩决定发挥对村民的实际笑话。
No one likes to hear the same joke twice and the same goes for pick-up lines.
没有人喜欢听同一个笑话两次，搭讪语也是一样。
Anderson, for example, whose failure to score in two years at the club, spanning 73 performances, has become a standing joke among the fans, but not one that amuses his manager.
比如说安德森，在两年的73场比赛中没有为俱乐部取得进球，已经成了球迷的一个老笑话，但是教练笑不出来。
One Web is as old as the Web itself: The 1993 New Yorker joke was that on the Internet no one knows you’re a dog.
1993年，《纽约人》上的一则玩笑说：在网络中，即使你是条狗也没人知道。
One of the reasons the IT profession is changing is that users are getting much smarter (yes, you read that correctly - that's not a joke).
其中一个原因是IT行业正在发生变化-用户变得越来越聪明(是的你没听错-我没有开玩笑)。
He's guilty of taking a perfectly fine joke and selling it as the second coming of Oscar Wilde: "Okay, this is a good one.
他对说出完美的笑话和把它像奥斯卡王尔德的作品样推出怀有愧疚感。
"Asking for a caravan was just a joke, really, I didn't expect to get one," he says.
“篷车，其实我并不需要，我只想开个玩笑。”他说。
There's an old joke that says "a man with one watch always knows what time it is; a man with two watches is never sure."
有一个流传已久的笑话：“佩戴一只手表的人常常知道时间，而佩戴两只手表后反而难以确定了”。
One lie has even become such a standard, that it's more of a joke than a real lie. I've said it to my son, but always with tongue-in-cheek.
有句谎话甚至被我讲成了笑话，我总是半玩笑半认真的对儿子提起它。
The difference between Ireland and Iceland, so the current joke goes, is one letter and six months.
现在有这样一个笑话：爱尔兰(Ireland)和冰岛(Iceland)有什么区别？一个字母和六个月。
It could be the biggest April Fool's joke ever played on the Internet, or it could be one of the worst days ever for computers connected to the network.
它会是Internet上有史以来最大的愚人节玩笑还是那些连接到网络的电脑的悲惨一日。
The former Autodesk CEO teased the lunchtime audience at UBS's media summit after a joke or two (one about low-quality 'Russian bride' online ads).
这位欧特克(Autodesk)的前首席执行长在瑞银(UBS)的媒体峰会上先是讲了一两个笑话（其中一个是有关劣质的“俄罗斯新娘”互联网广告），然后又拿已到午餐时间的听众开起了玩笑。
The idea of recommending humor in a presentation gets a bad rap because of the common and tired practice of opening up a speech with a joke, almost always a lame one.
因为那些把笑话用于演讲开始的尝试低级而老套，它们所使用的笑话大部分都是蹩脚的，导致建议在展示中使用幽默的想法受到了无理的谴责。
When you tell a joke on a brightly lit stage in front of a crowd of people who have paid a bunch of money to laugh, and no one laughs, it can be horrifying.
但是你站在灯光闪耀的舞台上，面对一群付了大把钞票来找乐的观众，你讲了一个笑话，却没人笑，这就会很恐怖。
When Sally told that silly joke about the sailor with one leg she really put her foot in her mouth.
萨莉吃晚饭时说了一个笑话，她拿一个只有一条腿的水手开玩笑。
Author's Note: This whole essay, although sprinkled with truisms here and there, is a joke and should be taken like one.
作者附言：这整篇文章是都是在搞笑而且应该被当成搞笑，尽管它到处都夹杂着一些自明之理。
WASHINGTON - One man posted a message to the White House Web site threatening to kill the president. "This is not a joke, " he warned, and typed in his name.
（华盛顿）——有人在白宫的网站上发贴，声称要干掉奥巴马，帖子称“哥不是说着玩儿的”，还附上了他的真实姓名。
He's in on the cosmic joke of being a "high-born dwarf" and is quick to give practical Westeros wisdom: "Trust no one."
命运和他开了个残酷的玩笑，让他生在贵族之家却身为侏儒，然而他迅速地以其睿智给出了一个实用的维斯·特洛大陆生存法则：“不要相信任何人。”
He's in on the cosmic joke of being a "high-born dwarf" and is quick to give practical Westeros wisdom: "Trust no one."
命运和他开了个残酷的玩笑，让他生在贵族之家却身为侏儒，然而他迅速地以其睿智给出了一个实用的维斯·特洛大陆生存法则：“不要相信任何人。”
应用推荐