I made clear to her that my money-lending had been simply the degradation of my will and my mind, my personal idea of self-castigation and self-exaltation.
我向她解释说，开当铺不过是我的意志和理智堕落的一种表现，是个人自怨自艾、自我吹嘘的想法。
My English is poor, I would highly appreciate if you can allow me to make more clear and comprehensive self-introduction in Chinese.
我的英文水平有限，所以我恳请能让我使用汉语更清楚、全面地展示我自己？
There exists a clear inescapable self-system I have been talking to. I consider establishing a system of pluralism and freedom as the charm of art and I am still developing my style.
在创作中，明显地有一种摆脱不掉的自身系统，一直与这个系统对话，建立系统的多元性和自由性，这也是我认为的艺术魅力之一，我寻觅着某种“个人风格”。
There exists a clear inescapable self-system I have been talking to. I consider establishing a system of pluralism and freedom as the charm of art and I am still developing my style.
在创作中，明显地有一种摆脱不掉的自身系统，一直与这个系统对话，建立系统的多元性和自由性，这也是我认为的艺术魅力之一，我寻觅着某种“个人风格”。
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