Late-shifters including Wayne Jingo had little choice but to risk it if they wanted to get home.

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But despite the intense scrutiny of his every action, very little is actually known about Wayne Rooney.

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"If we do go up on Sunday we have to thank Jimmy Quinn a little bit as he signed Wayne Hatswell who is probably our player of the year, " he said.

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But the director, Randall Miller, and a cadre of screenwriters (John Semper and Cynthia Friedlob did the script from a story by Michael Swerdlck, Wayne Rice, and Richard Breene), come up with little more than brutal slapstick and up-to-the-minute slang.

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"They jumped us pretty good and I think our guys maybe panicked a little when shots weren't going in, " coach Wayne Tinkle said.

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Both as Wayne and as super-Wayne he seems indifferent, as the films themselves are, to the activities of little people, and to the claims of the everyday, preferring to semi-purse his lips, as if preparing to whistle for an errant dog, and stare pensively into the distance.

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