Bids came in from current Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie and the novelist Tom Clancy, but Kraft held the ace: the stadium's operating covenant.

FORBES: On The Cover/Top Stories

This is written by Steve Oedekerk and directed by Tom Shadyac, the team behind the "Ace Ventura" movies (our motto: "more-more-more"), so the complete absence of a light touch isn't exactly a shock.

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