"Knowing that I did pass our 10th wedding anniversary and Tom's birthday -- and feeling my way through the maze of grief that you go through during the first year -- I think that it will make those occasions next year a little more open to happiness and joy, knowing that we've experienced them at least once without Tom, " she said.

CNN: Relatives recite poems, give tribute, try to heal

So keeping your options open leads to less happiness and success, not more.

FORBES: Why Keeping Your Options Open Is Really, Really Bad Idea

We want a nudge toward happiness, a little magic to open the pressure valve of everyday life -- the sublime thrill of transcendence to be found in a Mendelssohn symphony or a Turner landscape, in a perfect kiss or perfect morning jog, in time spent with our families and friends.

CNN: What really makes people happy

Research by Harvard psychologist Dan Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness, shows that reversible, keep-your-options-open decisions reliably lead to lower levels of satisfaction than irreversible ones.

FORBES: Why Keeping Your Options Open Is Really, Really Bad Idea