"Once again, I want our fans to understand I'm working my butt off to get better, period, " Collins said.
At 14 I won a scholarship to an exclusive New England boarding school where I proceeded to get my butt kicked.
"I have busted my butt over the past few months just to get this side of the house functioning, " Murray said.
"I don't know if I have something to prove, but it definitely puts a huge fire under my butt to just be better, " Te'o said.
"I've been working my butt off on that for the last year, " he declares, noting his lobbying efforts as an officer of the industry's trade association.
"I've been studying my butt off, learning formations, learning protections, " said Smith, wearing No. 7 because his old No. 12 from his college days is Joe Namath's retired number.
My "routine" outpatient surgery (which was on my butt -- get all your sophomoric jokes out of the way now) went awry and I was in terrible, excruciating pain.
"Here were women who are going to encourage me to get off my butt but weren't going to judge me if I didn't look like a swimsuit model in six months, " she said.
While older, more experienced and better-paid reporters were getting laid off left and right, I got hired because my employer could pay me pennies, and I would work my butt off to prove myself.
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One of the reasons I didn't act a fool when I was in school was because I feared my father taking the belt to my butt, and that was enough to keep me on the straight and narrow.
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They start to ask a lot of questions, like, 'How much can she really know about me from my cigarette butt?
"It is regrettable that there was a misunderstanding arising from my comment, " said Butt.
So, on a Friday night, shortly before its nine billionth airing of some episode of Beavis and Butt-Head, I got to make my national television debut alongside spasmodically obnoxious MTV personality Kennedy.
But it is my hope and prayer that Congress gets off its self-centric butt and makes Qualified Charitable Distributions a permanent part of our tax code. (Can you hear the crickets chirping?) This would allow the charitably inclined and qualified charitable organizations to make predictable plans to pursue their worthy missions, tax free.
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