My husband gave me a car, as if I were a 21-year-old finishing college.
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Even if I were a few inches taller the room in economy would still be satisfactory.
My bias is growth, but if I were a mutual fund investor, I'd stick with the Windsors.
"If I were a betting man, I'd say I do not believe that Lantus causes cancer, " Buse says.
If I were a policeman, knowing his family situation, would I have arrested him for visiting a prostitute?
If I were a baseball player, a .430 batting average would put me in the Hall of Fame.
"If I were a corporate sponsor, I'd want this resolved quickly, " says Salt Lake City councilwoman Deeda Seed.
Sam Sifton: My job is to eat in restaurants almost as if I were a civilian, eating out with friends.
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If I were a prospective customer searching for product information and not ready to buy you just lost my business.
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She neither smiled nor cried, but stared at me with a peculiar gentleness, as if I were a kind of nourishment.
If I were a Greek politician, faced with these options, I'd be pretty keen to put off that meeting as well.
If I were a professor grading this paper I would give it an F and tell them to do it again.
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If I were a pure contrarian this kind of stuff would just send me screaming down the street in a bull costume.
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But my inability to identify a role model left me feeling scared and alone, as if I were a study of one.
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But if I were a member of the Newton team or an athletic administrator at Auburn University, I would not rest easy.
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If I were a millennial, I would be annoyed with popular media.
If I were a poor person in a red state, my primary issue would be which candidate, including Obama, speaks to my needs.
Yet this has been slow to develop, and if I were a Republican, I would be salivating at the Democrats lacking a sense of urgency.
If I were a broker, it would be a different story.
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If I were a buyer today in one of the American department stores, I would go with extremes the most beautiful, the more expensive, the more eccentric.
And if I were a Democrat, I would be saying that taking this seat from the GOP column may help keep the Senate in the control of Democrats.
If I were a traditional publisher, I would be running not walking to set up a direct sales platform and start doing some serious community building.
If I were a much more cynical person than I am I would even suggest that there might be an element of expectations management in the recent announcement.
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Now if I were a litigious sort of fellow I might wonder what kind of discrimination Wal-Mart is employing that effectively bars so many men from those non-management positions.
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If I were a terrorist and wanted to get a weapon of mass destruction in the United States, my method of first choice would be a ship-borne cargo container.
If I were a professional cyclist during this era, and I wanted to win and I knew these percentages, most anyone reading this piece would be tempted towards using PEDs.
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Oh, and there's a bit of "If I Were a Rich Man" from "Fiddler on the Roof, " sung by one Willy Blowman, a swish lawyer in a flashy yellow suit.
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