But sometimes a merely above-average athlete becomes a star thanks to a single, invaluable weapon that opponents just can't stop.

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Later, after Veda grows up and becomes a radio star (played by Evan Rachel Wood), Haynes gives her a porcelain pallor and a mannered style of speech.

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As a star's shelf life becomes ever shorter, her challenge is to extend hers by leveraging her celebrity into an enduring brand which, if well tended, will keep her on our list for years to come.

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Once a star has sunk as low as Lohan, she becomes uninsurable.

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That's a job for our schools, but right now our children don't learn the words of "The Star-Spangled Banner, " let alone how a bill becomes a law.

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