Many of those in today's audience - even Alan Cumming - will have felt the barb of a bad review.
Alan is here this afternoon -- where is Alan?
WHITEHOUSE: President Obama Speaks on Comprehensive Immigration Reform | The White House
But then the airwaves went eerily quiet and for an hour nothing was heard from the Chancellor Alistair Darling - an old friend of Geoff Hoon - or Home Secretary Alan Johnson - many MPs' preferred replacement.
After all, we're just beginning to recover from the fallout of the much-milder Alan Greenspan deflation of 1997-2001.
Moments after his first 200m defeat in nine years - to Brazil's Alan Oliveira - on Sunday, Pistorius suggested his opponent had an unfair advantage as his prosthetics were too long.
Before departure the Lions also lost the services of Ireland scrum-half Tomas O'Leary - who broke an ankle and was replaced by Scotland's Mike Blair - and O'Leary's Munster team-mate Alan Quinlan after the back-row was handed a 12-week suspension.
And of course the performances -- by Bogie, Bacall or even Alan Ladd -- were models of mysterious force within a narrow dramatic spectrum.
Three actors of "The Gershwins' Porgy and Bess" -- Audra McDonald, Norm Lewis and David Alan Grier -- earned nominations, though only McDonald (who also is on ABC's "Private Practice") grabbed an award for best performance by a leading actress in a play.
Bishop scored in bizarre fashion just after half-time when Alan Gow's free-kick deflected off his backside and into Addicks keeper Rob Elliot's net.
Wolves' defence was up against it, and Paul Ince had to clear a dangerous-looking Alan Poulton corner before Alex Rae blocked a well-struck free-kick by Darren Barnard.
The Wolves hit back with two cracking tries in two minutes, scored by wingers Mark Forster and Wakefield-born Alan Hunte, but too far out for stand-off Steve Blakeley to convert.
That reshuffle also saw two of Mr Prescott's closest supporters - Alan Meale and Richard Caborn - removed from his department, significantly weakening his power base.
One hostage - Alan Wright, 37, from Aberdeenshire - described hiding in an office when the Islamists attacked, before cutting through a fence and escaping.
Like Sunderland, there is uncertainty over the position of their manager - Alan Shearer accepted the role on a temporary basis back in April and remained distinctly undecided about his future after Sunday's game.
Three of the knighthoods have been given to head teachers - Alan Davies, of Copland Community School and Technology Centre in Brent, west London, Bruce Liddington, of Northampton School for Boys, and Michael Wilshaw, of St Bonaventure's School in Newham, east London.
The move sparked an angry reaction from the arts community - including actor Alan Cumming and playwright David Greig - who feared the new scheme was unsustainable and unlikely to be delivered in time.
Liverpool, with returning captain Steven Gerrard back in the side, were always in control against a disappointing Newcastle -- who have still to collect their first victory under temporary manager Alan Shearer -- and they took a deserved 22nd -minute lead through Yossi Benayoun.
But when they included strikes of the quality of the first and last against Leicester at Filbert Street - part of a hat-trick which Alan Hansen described as the greatest he had ever seen - who cares?
That is why veterans are snapped up by start-ups, says Alan Baker, president of the Israel-Canada Chamber of Commerce in Tel Aviv.
The graphic-novel creators Alan Moore and David Lloyd conceived the material in the nineteen-eighties during the reign of Margaret Thatcher.
Animal-behavior researcher Alan Poling of Western Michigan University, who has studied the mine-sweeping rats, isn't sure how much heightened sensitivity will help.
And you choose who you work for -- I mean AMPAS -- with Sid Ganis and Alan Bergman as chair and vice-chair of this ball?
The system could thus provide astronomers with invaluable information about planet-disc interaction, suggests Alan Boss, a leading planet-formation theorist at the Carnegie Institution in Washington.
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Maguire hit breaks of 121 and 111 on his way to a 5-0 second-round win over Alan McManus, while Burnett edged Robert Milkins 5-3 in their first-round match.
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Certainly, limo dispatcher Sebastian Lazaro gives the Mamet play--which features Alan Alda, Liev Schreiber and Gordon Clapp, all of whom are up for Tonys--his own personal rave.
Therefore, if you're Alan Greenspan--a product of government--you keep a close eye on the competition: private currencies!
Celtic club-mate Alan Thompson had been dismissed earlier in the heated Glasgow derby.
Former St Johnstone team-mates Alan Main, Stevie May and Bobby Barr were among those to also pay tribute on Twitter.
BBC: Former footballer Darren Wilcox dies from cancer aged 21
Alan Green-span has had a voracious appetite for economic statistics, but no one thing or collection of things has consistently guided him.
Professor Alan Maryon-Davis, president of the Faculty of Public Health, welcomed the vision, saying public health chiefs were keen to meet the challenge.
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