I started out I wanted to help people, but I became desperate and selfish.
刚开始我想帮助人们，但我后来却变得绝望而自私。
I became desperate and two packets of cigarettes were hardly enough to benumb my nerves.
我对生活绝望了，一日两包香烟已无法麻醉我的神经。
'I do. You see, when life was difficult, I became desperate, and now all I have is regret. '
是的。你知道，生活艰难时，我变得绝望了，现在我只有满腹的悔恨。
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