Having laid waste to his computer rivals, the paper says he's now massacring the English language.
BBC: News | UK | 'Night of the short knives' disappoints press
The paper says that financial firms need to work with regulators to create a new financial architecture.
The paper says that Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat afterwards apologised and distanced himself from the stone-throwing students.
The paper says the recommendation is likely to raise concerns within the BBC about the corporation's editorial independence.
"Pakistan needs peace at home and in the region if it is to develop and prosper, " the paper says.
The paper says it has established that it was previously known as the Rim K, and registered in Lebanon.
Obesity among six-year-olds has doubled in recent years to 8.5%, and trebled to 15% in 15-year-olds, the paper says.
The secondary alternatives are even less plausible for Lake Erie, the paper says.
"They are the Lennon and McCartney of the political world", the paper says.
The paper says "career criminals" with more than 20 convictions are hardened felons by any reckoning, and should be behind bars.
Citing "diplomatic sources", the paper says a border map that both Beijing and Delhi can accept will attempt to be drawn.
BBC: China morning round-up: Inflation and economy discussed
"Bergoglio's stance against gay marriage, however, predictably earned him the ire" of gay rights groups in in Chile, the paper says.
The paper says that the rebels have the technical ability to strike not only in the region but also in Europe.
"This has to some extent cast a shadow over the way in which these countries accept the invitation, " the paper says.
The paper says to emphasise the importance of this responsibility, the government should seek to include it in the NHS Constitution.
"Some churches will be open all night on Saturday-Sunday, " the paper says.
"Lionel Jospin is no greenhorn in the political game, " the paper says.
In Friday's Sun, under the headline "Heir it is", the paper says: "Pic of naked Harry you've already seen on the internet".
The paper says "her departure is yet another setback for the BBC show that many feel has been overshadowed by its ITV rival Downton Abbey".
Pirates also enjoy virtual anonymity through multiple screen names, the paper says.
The paper says many government departments act like "surly teenagers" by refusing to talk to each other and only looking out for themselves.
The paper says the forensic scientist who investigated his suicide was a junior assistant who had never worked on a suspicious death before.
Alternatively, the paper says part of income tax could be used by splitting the tax into a health tax and a general tax.
"A special operation is in progress in Cyprus, and its goal is far from saving the economy or the banking system, " the paper says.
"All face questions about the way the mild-mannered germ warfare expert was thrust into the maelstrom of the Iraqi arms affair, " the paper says.
The paper says he feels it was "bodily appropriated" for the film, which was released in 2000, five years after his book was published.
The paper says moves to equalise the tax system would have to be carried out more slowly to avoid a sudden fall in living standards.
The last remains of the Yugoslav state "died yesterday in a play which was more in the nature of burlesque than tragedy", the paper says.
But the paper says one issue that both parties have found common ground on is that Donald Rumsfeld, the U.S. Defense Secretary, has to go.
The paper says it ought to be an opportunity for a viable idea of modern, social democracy to emerge, but no candidate merits victory yet.
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